I have found three people with today as their birthday and one of them just happens to be my beautiful best friend who danced her way into her 40th birthday (without me :-<) last night. I really tried to be there for her but I did leave her in really good company (and in a nice ass limo mind you!) It just wouldn't be a testament to our friendship if we didn't get lost and have an adventure on our excursion so I submit for everyone's reading pleasure what happened to me while my friends were partying it up in Sacramento.
Today is Christina's birthday and last night she wanted to "go clubbin" so that she could dance into her 40th birthday. Her sisters rented a limo and a few of her close friends were heading up to sac to some dance clubs. Being she is my best friend I didn't want to miss out but as I've previously mentioned my soul is no longer my own and I had to be at work 2 hours away at 6:15 in the morning. We were supposed to leave at 9:30 so I decided I would follow them to the first club and then take off from there (at least it was in the direction of home). Well the limo didn't get there until 9:45 and we didn't get out of Stockton until 10:15 after stopping at the Quik Stop for them to get booze and soda. When we got to Sacramento I lost the limo but luckily knew where I was going. After driving up and down the street that this place was supposed to be on for about 20 minutes I get a phone call from the limo. They can't find it either. Turns out McGees had changed to some cabo wabo place. I decided to just give up and told them to go to one of the other clubs, I was just going to go home. Well as I was heading to the freeway I see this Chevron selling gas for $2.04. WOW! That's a good price I think. Mind you, I'm not in a very good part of Citrus Heights and the gas station was pretty much deserted but who can pass up gass for $2.04? I pull in and head up to pay (I had cash with me for once and after hearing your story wasn't going to use my card :-P). There is a sign on the door "locked at night use window at the front of the store. GREAT! I hand this guy my money and head back to pump my gas. What you might not know is that my car was broken into when I lived in Sac. When I took it to Geweke to have it fixed they took off my gas door to match the paint color and when they put it on they forgot the spring so when I pull the lever in the car the gas door does not pop open. As such the only way to get into the gas tank is to hold up the lever while prying open the door. This always proves to be difficult since my arms are not made of rubber and are nowhere near long enough to accomplish this task. This is certainly not something I took into account when I decided to pull into a deserted gas station on a rainy night at 11:30 where even the big burly gas station man won't come out of his locked store. So I rig the fuel release just right with some stuff I had in the car and am able to contort my body just enough to get the fuel door open. My passenger side door is still wide open and its starting to rain (they just don't make awnings like they used to) when I heard "STOP IT GET THE F&#( AWAY FROM ME DAMNIT" I look up to see this homeless man standing about 20-30 feet in front of my car yelling at the invisible person next to him. He doesn't seem to see me but in my infinite wisdom I decided I would shut my car door. The sound of my door slamming made his attention snap to me. It was like one of those scenes in the horror movies where you are trying to remain unnoticed and the slightest sound makes them zero in on you. So the crazy guy starts moving towards me. I'm kinda frozen wide eyed staring at him as I chug my arizona green tea. He suddenly stops and says "He's this tall and this big and he wants to lick the back of my head" The only thing I could think to say at this point was "Woah, really? I hate when that happens". I guess this must have been the right answer because he just stares at me for a minute (probably thinking I'm either crazier than he is or a figment of his imagination) and then starts yelling at the big guy licking the back of his head and moves away from my car. About that time the gas pump clicked off and I went up to get my change from the man in the booth and try to walk as normally as possible to my car where I immediately lock my doors and peel out of there. That adrenaline rush was certainly enough to keep me awake on the two hour drive home.