My Music

Friday, May 19, 2006

Shanda sounds off - Immigration

Since it is the end of the semester I am getting papers back that I wrote for classes. I got this one back today from my cultural anthropology class. After re-reading it I was like "damn...I kick ass" so I thought I would "publish" it :-)
The Dilemma of Americas Illegal Immigration Policies

The issue of illegal immigration is an interesting issue in a country that is made up of the descendents of immigrants. The nations current immigration issues are not new. As a developing country with such a unique form of government, America is faced with having to balance the philosophy of freedom for all and the practicality of distributing scarce resources amongst an ever growing population. In the history of the development of American society there are many examples of illegal (im)migration. There has never been an effective way of defending against the problems this migration causes to society, and almost without exception the illegal immigrants have been eventually granted amnesty, if only because the government does not have the methods or the means to enforce the laws that it creates.
America is one of the richest countries in the world. It is also a nation that was founded on the principle of providing a haven for the poor and disenfranchised of the world. Society, however, has developed the attitude of the political superpowers that our forefathers were trying to escape from. As such, I believe the government should be considering that illegal immigration is actually a symptom of the underdevelopment that we encourage in the world in order to line the pockets of our wealthy citizens. The pope makes an excellent point when he says, The problem of illegal immigration cannot be considered apart from the underdevelopment that motivates it. (Penalver: 9-10)
The argument against illegal immigration is that our society has laws that are expected to be followed. I counter that such laws are ineffectually enforced at best. Politicians are not able to come to an agreement of how to proceed in relation to immigration reform and changes to public policy are slow. The last reform to the law was in 1986.
No one majority is willing to take a stand against illegal immigration, as evidenced by the fact that since 1965 the nations leaders have only once formally addressed this issue. In doing so they granted amnesty to millions of illegal immigrants and failed to make any provisions for actually enforcing the laws in the future. This is just the beginning of Americas arbitrary policy making. In 1990 the president signed a law creating an annual immigration lottery allowing 50,000 individuals from selected nations to go to the front of the line and automatically become permanent residents. (Wayne: 1)
We must consider the legal impetus for the laws of our nation. If we are not going to enforce the policies that we create, the government is wasting their time and taxpayers money to go through the process of putting them on the books. American leaders have routinely disregarded the broken laws of citizens and non citizens alike. The legal doctrine of necessity is the oft used defense of illegal immigrants because the doctrine makes it lawful for someone in extreme need to disregard the law in order to satisfy that need, as long as in doing so they do not inflict an even greater harm than the one they seek to avoid. (Penalver: p9-10) Ethically, how can a society who has continued to allow, and granted amnesty to, lawless squatters justify enforcement of laws which have routinely been disregarded throughout history?

Wayne, Alex. 2005. Questioning the Risks of Immigration'Lotto'. CQ Weekly Congressional Quarterly Inc
Eduardo Moisés Peñalver. 2006. Are Illegal Immigrants Pioneers? THE IRONY OF AMERICAN HISTORY. Commonweal New York: Vol. 133, Iss.9, p.9-10

Tuesday, May 16, 2006



Ok I don't know if I am just especially sensitive or what because I have been really good lately about not letting unimportant things get to me, but tonight I am frustrated and I need to vent. I apologize in advance for the language I used to express my frustration...if such vulgar language offends you I urge you to stop reading now.

I don't count on much in life but I have come to rely on my television giving me the happy endings that I very rarely give myself in real life. The advent of "reality" t.v. has only been made bearable by the fact that most of that shit is less real then the stuff that was not claiming to be real. However, this brings us to tonights season finale of Grey's Anatomy.....Again, I warn you, I am going to tell you how it ends so if you don't want to know this is your last chance to stop.....

Ok, enough of that. Below (because I'm lazy) is the conversation I had with a friend immediately following the show.

vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv do you watch grey's anatomy?
Shawn: only seen one episode will likely order it Damn...I needed to vent
Shawn: lol i wont remember anyway Yeah but its hard to explain if you don't know the history
Shawn: true So theres this intern that falls for a dr at the hospital...they have a romance and at the end of last season we found out that he's married Well she begs him to choose her and he doesn't...he chooses to "do the right thing" and try to work things out with his wife who btw he left because he walked in on her sleeping with his best friend his wife also happens to be a dr so all season long they are trying to all three work together things happen and the guy won't leave her alone....he does the whole I want you then pulls away shit well the intern sleeps around a bit after the break up because she's frickin hurting things are going ok...she's getting better and they are actually kinda being friends but of course that is not good enough for the fucking dr (who happens to be patrick dempsey) When the intern starts dating his vet and he finds out he flips out he won't talk to anyone and ends up calling her a whore she's like fuck you I'm moved on the best I knew how because you fucking broke me go be with your wife I'm done well tonight was the season finale and apparently that was a lie.... they were at this function (her with the vet and him with his wife) and he kept staring at her so she excuses herself and he chases after her and they fucked! I can't believe she fucking fucked him... well I can because I know thats what I would end up doing but TV is not supposed to be like that it is supposed to teach us a lesson and she is supposed to kick him in the balls and run off with her vet
Shawn: its the finale its supposed to be nervewrecking the worst part is at the end the vet still not knowing that they did it offers to drive her home (because some other drama was going on in the hospital) and she hesitates...she stands there staring at the be continued...what kind of crap is that! If I wanted that crap I would record my own life...

At that point I had vented enough to blow off some steam and to release enough pent up energy to let poor shawn off the hook ;-) but now I feel the need to elaborate...

It is no secret I have horrendous judgement when it comes to love and relationships. I am no longer embarrased to say that I have been with a married man and made the wrong choice more often than not when faced with this type of decision. I wish I could say that I had come to a point where I am strong willed enough to rule my emotions so that this is not an issue in my future, but I can't...yet. What I can say is that I don't watch television to see myself on the screen (in slightly more aesthetically pleasing pictures). I am famous for wanting my endings happy, and sweet, and so sickeningly unrealistic that I say "it doesn't happen like that in real life". Is this because I'm a depressed individual who is in search of an escape from reality? Perhaps....I like think, however, that it is more that I am an optomist who needs to see examples of how its SUPPOSED TO FRICKIN WORK! If people with scripts can't get it right, how in the hell is there any hope for stupid schmucks like me? Its not that I think "oh its ok to do that because so and so on tv did it"...I am honestly looking for a little guidance in people I am not personally vested with.

Now logically I understand how the whole concept of a season finale is supposed to work. I am the first one to admit that the producers of this show are genius for hooking me in so much I blog about it. As frustrated as I am I am not even saying that the show didn't have it's desired effect...I mean it is not like I am NOT going to watch it next season (if only to watch what new and exciting ways I am going to screw up my life next).....I'm just saying that I am disappointed. I guess what I'm really disappointed with is that I'm sitting here screaming at the T.V. the right thing to do and I can not say that I wouldn't do the same thing if faced with that situation. What kind of wacko does that make me? Wait...don't answer that ;-)

Ok, I'm done. For those of you who have never seen me blog like this I am sorry. For those of you who made it to the bottom of this blog and want the last 5 minutes of your life back, tough luck...I gave you enough opportunity to run. I wouldn't have been me, I'm used to it

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Happy Mother's Day!

Mom and I may not always get along but she is the one person who is always on my side, always there for me, and will always be in my heart. She is the one person I know who I can always turn to, no matter what. It took me a while to realize that the reason we don't get along is actually because we are so much alike. We are both fabulous friends, and caring people who sometimes have a hard time communicating what we are feeling inside. I feel very fortunate to have my mom, and hope that I too have a daughter who feels that way about me. Here's to us mom...I love you!

That's right, I'm a hottie :-P

You Are Smokin' Hot

You're a terrible flirt, a sharp dresser, and a party animal.

Of course, you're totally sizzling too. And for you, being hot just comes naturally.

Friday, May 12, 2006

Monday, May 08, 2006


How is it possible that I feel so much better on a MONDAY than I did on a SATURDAY!?!? The only thing that I can attribute it to is that I actually got some sleep this weekend. First there was the 5 hour nap on Saturday and then I actually got about 8 hours Saturday night and into Sunday. I even got a full 8 hours sleep on Sunday into Monday, despite the Margarita Sunday festivities I attended (margarita's rock!). I am still a bit restless but my ability to concentrate is much improved...which is a good thing since I have 2 papers and 4 finals left to do in a 2 week timespan. I am planning to push myself through it and party it up when I go to Stockton for Shawney's birthday (and christie's show) on 05/20/06. Then after that I have the one year anniversary of my rebirth as an independent woman. I am going to celebrate this with a 5 day weekend and our annual memorial day camping trip. It is hard to believe that it has been a year already. I can definitely see a drastic improvement in all areas of my life, and I am thankful that I am able to look back with a minimum of regrets.

Before I can get to the 5 day weekend or the party weekend I am going to have to get through not only school but also the first mother's day weekend without my grandmother. It seems that the weather cleared up just in time for us to spread her ashes which, while appropriate, is definitely going to put some extra emotional strain on the family. Wish us luck :-)

Saturday, May 06, 2006

That about sums it up :-P

You Are Lightning

Beautiful yet dangerous
People will stop and watch you when you appear
Even though you're capable of random violence

You are best known for: your power

Your dominant state: performing

So thats what's in that head of mine :-) I am...haven't really WRITTEN an actual blog for a while, just haven't been inspired I guess. Well that and it is frickin insanely busy at the end of the semester. What I should be doing right now? Homework to be sure, I have some laundry that's stinkin up my closet...and the list goes on. I'm just having a hard time finding my motivation. Its like I'm limping through the week and spend the weekends recovering enough to do it again and again. When does it get easier? I'll take me some of that!

Don't get me wrong, I'm not sad or depressed...I am actually feeling content in WHERE I am...its just in what I'm DOING where I am that is giving me a problem. It feels like I am stuck in purgatory....around the corner I can see a fantastic future but it can't come fast enough. I don't think that I have posted about it, but I have been accepted to the Respiratory Therapy program so in just 2 years I will have a degree and good paying job opportunities ANYWHERE in the world that I want to go....I could theoretically survive on my own in Seattle even....that is just amazing to me, and a little scary. Yet it feels like since I found out time has turned to quicksand and I seem to be being sucked back into oblivion...keeping my dreams just out of my reach.

On top of my lack of energy I have been going a bit stir crazy...hows that for for an oxymoron. If only I knew how to harness that energy I would be golden. Now that I am finally getting comfortable in my surroundings I am itching to get out and have fun but there is not much opportunity for that up least not on a regular basis.

Then there is the topic of companionship. This is the kicker. I knew I couldn't quelch my desires forever...its been almost a year and I am starting to feel those long hidden away desires to love and be loved creeping up again. These feelings scare me because I have always had trouble with balance. I kinda felt that I have to bury that part of me if I have any hope of getting through the next two years because if I let it out I won't be able to control it. Then again, I can't imagine not being touched for the next two years. I don't think that I can do that either. So which is the lesser of two evils, or is there a way to balance it so that I am not always in this psychotic tug of war?

As usual you can see that I am living in my head and that is what is getting me in trouble. If I could figure out how to turn the voices off I would be in such a better place. Alas, perhaps if I turned the voices off I would be kinda get used to them after a while. Maybe that is why I can't because if I do then I have to be by myself and that is what truly scares me the most.

A little boredom never hurt anybody

Where did you take your default photo?
Christie's dining room

Who is the first & second person on your top 8?
Brat Boy Chris and Timber EEEanne

What exactly are you wearing right now?
sweats and a sleevless shirt

What is your current problem?
Too many to mention...

What makes you most happy?
my kitties

If you could go back in time, and change something, what would it be?
I would finish school earlier

Name an obvious quality you have?
Compassion and caring

What's the name of the song that you're listening to?
Not listening to a song...I am watching soap operas

Any celeb you would marry?
MARRIED!?!?!? No way in hell I'm getting married to anyone

Have someone with the same birthday as you?
I talk to them all the time...just don't know anybody personally

Do you have a crush on someone?
Thats for me to know and you to find out

Ever sang in front of a large audience?
What do you consider large?

Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity?
Yes but I don't believe them

Do you speak any other languages?
A little french...and I sign

Have you ever ridden in a Hummer limo?
NO! But I should have....but I'm not bitter.....wait does it count if I talked to people on the phone who were in the hummer as I drove behind it? Oh I guess not.

Do you ever watch MTV?
When I was like 8 and they still showed music videos...oh yeah and if there is a real world marathon :-P

What's something that really bugs you?
Many things...being at home doing this survey on a friday night for one :-P


Middle name:

Current location:
Yankee the bedroom

Hair length:
Short...even shorter when curly

Eye color:
Green Hazel

Do you live with your parents:

Do you get along with your parents:

Are your parents married/separated/divorced?:
Yes...almost 30 years

Do you have any siblings?:
Robert Ray (or as I call him Booby Bobby)

Ice cream flavor:
Rocky Road

Clothing brand:
I'm not really a brand name kinda girl


Do you write memos on your hand?
Uh huh

Call people back?
I would if anyone ever called me...mostly I get telemarketers or student loan consolidation people and NO I don't call them back

Believe in love:
Of course...something that hurts so bad has to be real

Sleep on a certain side of the bed?

Glasses or contacts?:
Glasses, only to read

Have any bad habits:
Biting my nails, forgetting my meds, procrastination, and many many more...

Gone skinny dipping?:

Broken a bone?
The question isn't if I have broken a bone, its which bone haven't I broken?

Had stitches?:
Only after being put in a straight jacket, and no I'm not kidding

Gone scuba diving?:
No :-(

Been stung by a jellyfish?:

Been stung by a bee?
Yes thank god I'm not allergic like my aunt

thrown up in a restaurant?:
Yes...don't remember why

Been to overnight camp?: camp...and no not band camp :-)

Sworn in front of your parents?:
Yes...I'm a bad bad daughter

Had detention?:
Nope I was goody two shoes!

Been sent to the principal's office?:
Only to drop off paperwork

Who was the last Person to IM you?:

What did it say?
Good night, I love you too

Who was the last Person to call you?
Mom...though I did get a missed call from an unknown number

Person you hugged?:
Mom or Dad

Person you tackled?
I reserve the right to remain silent as the answer can and will incriminate me :-)

Thing you touched?:

Thing you said:
DAMNIT why can't I get comfortable!

Thing you ate?:
Ice cream

Thing you drank?:

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Honesty is the best policy

Now that you have opened this you must fill it out yourself!!
Answer these questions honestly.

1. Honestly, what color is your underwear?
flesh...I try not to wear them if I can get away with it

2. Honestly, whats on your mind right now?
The paper due tomorrow that I have had 6 weeks to do which isn't done.

3. Honestly, what are you doing right now?
This survey and and then I am doing the paper till it is finished or I pass out...whichever comes first!

4. Honestly, what did you do today?
Went on an adventure down a country road I had never been down before....ended up sitting on a rock along a creek running under a covered bridge..went to the bank and got jamba juice....went to work and managed to have the worst day....yet I'm still smiling...I'll let you think about that one for a while :-)

5. Honestly, do you think you are attractive?
I'm beginning to.

6. Honestly, have you done something bad today?
Define bad...I don't think so

7. Honestly, do you watch disney channel?
I do...I secretly like those teeny bopper shows like lizzie maguire

8. Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now?

9. Honestly, what makes you happy most of the time?
My kitties

10. Honestly, do you bite your nails?
always have probably always will

11. Honestly, what is your mood right now?

12. Honestly, have you had an eating disorder?
This is not the body of someone with an eating disorder :-)

13. Honestly, do you want to see someone this very minute?
yes there are a lot of people I'd like to see

14. Honestly, do you have a deep dark secret?
I have many secrets....I don't think they are dark though....the keep me mysterious :-)

15. Honestly, do you hate someone right now?
Yeah...unfortunately....I really wish I could be indifferent, it takes much less energy

16. Honestly, who/what do you want to hug right now?
I plead the 5th

17. Honestly, are you loyal?

18. Honestly, are you in denial?
Not now...I've visited but currently I'm digging reality way too much

19. Honestly, wouldn't you rather be having sex right now?
Ummmm....DUH! Who wouldn't?

20. Honestly, who is/are your best friend(s)?
Christina, Shawny, Deb, Brenty

21. Honestly, do you like someone?
Yeah...I have to admit I do

22. Honestly does anyone like you?
I think so...I hope so at least

23. Honestly, is it going anywhere with them?
I am the wrong person to ask about that

24. Honestly, do you smoke weed?
I have...but it really doesn't do much for me

25. Honestly, do you do drugs?
Caffeine...lots and lots of caffeine.

26. Honestly, have you ever drank/ will you ever drink alcohol?
Oh yeah! This is a certainty