Something to be

"I feel happy...and you know how big that is for me" is my quote of the day. This evening (well yesterday evening now) I finally realized how far I have actually come in the past year and a half. Its been tough at times, and there were many instances in which I felt like giving up...but I didn't. I am in such a better place not just physically, but mentally and spiritually. Moments like tonight are what keep me going. There is no need to go into the details. Very few people would understand anyway. I just want to document the first night in a long time I have felt like a person that I am proud to be. I am posting the song that I think represents what the last 4 years have been for me. I hope it helps you understand why I am so excited about getting to what I have achieved. As always, Rob says it better than I ever could :-)

Something to be
by Rob Thomas

Hey man
I don't wanna hear about love no more
I don't wanna talk about how I feel
I don't really wanna be me no more

Dress down now I look a little too
Boy next door
Maybe I should try to find a downtown whore
That'll make me look hardcore
I need you to tell me what to stand for

I've been looking for something
Something I've never seen
We're all looking for something
Something to be

Hey man
Play another one of those heartbreak songs
Tell another story how things go wrong
And they never get back
My pain is a platinum stack
Take that shit back
You don't wanna be me when it all goes wrong
You don't wanna see me with the houselights on
I'm a little too headstrong
Stand tall
I don't wanna get walked on

I've been looking for something
Something I've never seen
We're all looking for something
Something to be

I can't stand what I'm starting to be
I can't stand the people that I'm starting to need
There's so much now
That can go wrong
And I don't need somebody
Trying to help it along
It's the same old song
Everybody says you've been away too long
Everybody wanna tell you what went wrong
Wanna make you like an icon
Till you believe it to be

I've been looking for something
Something I've never seen
We're all looking for something
Something to be